Once I am in the House of Ladies I am going to institute quite a FEW CHANGES.
- For a start of there will be pink curtains put up at the windows in The House.
- All academics will be given a GIGANTIC pay rise in order to help them catch up with teechers.
- Girl academics will be given additional cash for shoes and clothing and will be given time off for facials.
- Homework in schools will be banned and no one will ever have to do tests as they are wicked.
- Further suggestions will be considered by me and all my lady friends.
Gosh
8 comments:
YEES!!!!
I am going to LOBBY you Dr Joolz for more v. important things:
1. Teenage girls to be given special dispensation for days off school and lying around sighing which is what they should be doing anyway.
2. The RAE should become a major Hollywood film starring Dr Joolz and Dr Kate and everyone should go and sob.
3. The teaching of synthetic phonics in primary schools should be branded a subversive practice with worrying undertones and therefore sent undercover.
4. Ipods should be given out to school children on entering secondary school to help with their art coursework.ALso email accounts. Also blogs.
YESSS!
Dr JOllz for president!
1. Introduce little stalls in the foyer of the house selling earrings, raw and organic food, shoes, bags, organic perfume-free (and perfumed) cosmetics for which the Ladies would have a discount. And a bar.
2. An area for shops such as Jigsaw, Hobbs, second hand vintage shops, a French bakery/ patisserie .... your favourite shop here. In fact, do away with the House of Commons and make it into a massive department store like John Lewis's'ss.
3. A graffiti wall where one can express one's politics artistically.
You Two are so clever. I would very much like you to help me in The House of Ladies. You can be my 'Ladies not waiting' - which means the same as Charlies Angels. Ladies of Action.
The House of Ladies will be redesigned as a female friendly area. Two floors will be devoted to shopping and services (facials and steam rooms etc,.) The rest will be for distraught teenagers who will be helped through all traumas by funky (non-patronising and also not trying to be young) people who UNDERSTAND. The staff will also have to be able to help with really hard homework.
There will be a Marks and Spencers foodhall near the exit so you can get stuff for tea on the way out.
Gosh - spinning in her grave!! What fun.
Cool!
I've missed all this fun as i have been holed up with grippe (flu) and even looking at my computer screen made me feel ill. I can't wait til you rule the house of ladies and LOVE the image of Frau Pankhurst spinning in her grave for some reason...
Poor you hope you are better now.
Dr Joolz I am a little slow off the mark - but this is the funniest post EVER!!!!!
Aha!! Glad to have made you laugh SimplyClare!
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